I guess it’s a blessing to have such friend that can understand you and give you some enlightenment when you’re feeling down or dumb about something or everything.

Sometimes I chatted with friends and can give ‘em some piece of advice. But, I guess even a dumpster can be full and need to dump what’s inside of it, right?

So, I met this so-called wiseman along my path of friendship. He was a weird and extraordinary person, at least when I first knew him. However, years passed and he actually changed into a different person. Through his stories, I found out that, he was abroad for a while and those experiences kinda changed him, somehow.

I can only say that I’m glad that I met him years ago while he was weird and seemed spoke different language on his own. Now? phiuuhhh…I can only say I have my own spiritual guidance/shrink/good brother, just name it.

It was really good and sweet on the other side of me being able to talk to you. I know I’m being dumb and I know that you keep on talking about how tough I am in facing those kind of problems. I came to realized that I only have to changed my perspective on things. I won’t let myself torture my own soul again. Especially, when my mood swing isn't that good, like having the paranoia feelings toward things or particular someone.

Just let it flow. Don’t hurt myself. Don’t think too much. Don’t bug about things that don’t kill me and stop punishing myself and especially give the love I have to someone that worthy to have it. FULLY!

He said something like, if there are some people that don’t and seems can’t understand when you care for ‘em then don’t punish yourself. Rather than ignore it and have pity on yourself. That’s not good. Stop torturing yourself with your own fears.

Its like a bang in my head, listening to his rants. But, I’m glad to be able to find someone in the wee hours of the nite talking nonsense and his there to listen up. Yup! Us –women- just want to be heard, that’s all and to find someone that can really listening to what you’re blabbering about is bliss.

Thank you, bro! (you know who you are!)
This is the least I can do to thank you. I really appreciate all those sarcasm and also words of wisdom? From you? C’mon! Hahahah… I don’t think that word fit, oh well…

As for your comments about having a bad taste on guys, ehmm…seems you’re not the only one mentioning about it err…I can only say that I don’t judge people by its cover. As long as I can be comfortable around ‘em I would just stay close. But if its not comfortable again, I think I know when I have to bounce 

Hope you ALWAYS have a wonderful life, buddy!

A note for myself:
Everything is in ME. If I let myself think differently then its going to be different, if I let myself think it matters than it will matter. In addition, if I let myself lose then I will lose. Especially when I let myself care TOO MUCH about what’s going on around other’s people life, that’s when I need to loosen up. Don’t let the paranoia eat me alive! Let yourself loose, Mei. I guess; I need to think about myself and learn to be an egoistic person too, once in a while. I can’t ever expect from someone else’s to change something inside of me. Its only me that can! YES!

This is truly inspiring note for my own soul.
Finally, I can write something to remind myself about me being stupid and dumb in some path of live. Well, people did. But, I rarely hear ‘em admit their own mistakes. Even sometimes its hard to say ‘ I’m sorry’ to someone.

I’m the type of person that can easily amuse by certain stories, a ‘lil act of kindness, sweet talks, pot of good tea, hugs, silly comments, stupid remarks, any kind of surprises (never experience it tho), good songs, good movies, Amaretto DiSarrono also Boltz Creme de Cassis even just to cuddle up with special someone or friends, last but not least making conversation in any topics that revolve around…

Aha! :)

Who are you out there that can join me in happiness?
heheh...come along then!