For the past weeks, I've been struggling with life issues. Therefore, I have been writing anything yet. Also, I feel my mood also going away. Been trying hard to sit in front of the computer and learn to write anything, didn't work.

So, as usual, I'm just going to watch my favorite TV serials online or anything on youtube, to get my mojo back. Still not working very much. But, today, I feel like I need to write something. Even though this one is a bit personal, but at least I write something in here. 

I've been reading a lot of positive article about the power of positive thinking and change the bad feeling into positive energy, try to learn 5 mins meditation daily too. Somehow this one works a bit with me. I feel calmer in facing the issues I mentioned. I learned to channel my grumpy energy to something more positive, or at least I try to realized when I feel sorry, I need to direct the bad thing into something else more positive. It's not easy, never been easy to try something new with yourself.  But hey, everything should start somewhere.

That's when I come to realize the word HOPE. The name exists at the last Pandora Box after everything evil were out if you know the story of it. So, I search thing that can give me more support for myself. Being myself and feel the love again. Some said, if you want someone to like you, one need to learn how to love themselves first. To me, this is the hardest part.

Argue with mom, slashing her with my rash comments or high pitched tone were one of the things happening. Again, every time it happens always leave me with a dent in my heart. I know I hurt someone I love deeply, but I can't seem to bring the words sorry to her because I didn't build that way.

Then hope also given by my dear friend Reza, he is my savior for the issues for the time being until I can repay him. I don't know how in the next future, but as for now I pray and hope for all his works and projects runs smoothly.

If you always think that you experience the worst day, NO. You need to stop thinking like that. You need to change it. Nothing good comes easy, they said. Therefore, this action also not easy to apply on yourself, because the hardest thing you can try to conquer is yourself.

Try to find your core when you're down, in any way you can. Some seek for God, some in the party, some in the solitude maybe you just haven't found your way yet. Never give up on yourself, that's what I want to tell you. Because once you give up, nothing will ever show.

Stand up and never give up no matter how hopeless you feel with your situation. Believe, there will always be a way up when you try to channel your energy to love yourself MORE than you usually do.

Stay positive,